In this picture I was 15 years old and desperately dreaming of the day I began to live, to be considered adult. I remember how I said determination of volermene go, you want to get away from my family, my feelings, myself. I was afraid of others but mostly I was afraid of my aggression that would frighten people. Aggressiveness that I've always been able to manage and direct the right way: that of artistic expression. I considered my horizons great if I had not even realized how easy it was to judge how best whatever came out just out of my room with green walls. And looking at those walls, losing myself in that shiny green that I had hung my paintings, I think I did the most beautiful and stupid speeches of my life. Once I tried to write as I saw myself in 10 years. He walked out the description of a man with a backpack on his shoulder in front of a horizon of possibilities, goals and unable to choose a certain preferred to sit and wait for the wind carried him away to the sea. There's never anything for sure in the end, I had understood even then that ... The difference however was that in that sadness, because let's face it, too, that is small when the pain gets worse, I did not trust people, I had no friends, they are not wanted. I wanted to understand first of all who I was, I wanted to be my friend before involving another person in my life ... Years later I can not say that it has developed a friendly relationship with myself but at least I managed to reach a compromise based on sincerity. I know my limits and I know perfectly well that when something hurts me, but really so bad, I can not talk about it. Precisely for this reason I finish writing this post. Time to time.
aimless traveler
0 comments:
Post a Comment